Emotionally Competent Leadership

It is interesting how a definition of vulnerability has changed from the Industrial Age to the Information Age. According to Porter-O'Grady and Malloch (2015), in the Industrial Age, a vulnerability was seen as a weakness. Furthermore, leaders were expected to be in control, in charge, and to know all the information. Leaders were supposed to have an answer to "every issue." As a leader in Industrial Age, you were expected to possess all the knowledge and have an answer for every question (Porter-O'Grady and Malloch, 2015). Boy, Am I glad I was not a leader at the Industrial Age!!! Being an introvert and mediator, I do not favor being in charge or control. :)

In contrast, in the Information Age leaders are more open to others, to new ideas, and aware of their limits (Porter-O'Grady and Malloch, 2015). When a leader is conscious of their limits, embraces those limits, he/she will build a trust with colleagues and create enjoyable work environment.

Dr. Brown's webcast was refreshing and very inspirational. As she pointed out, no one likes to be vulnerable. As a society, we tend to view vulnerability as a birthplace of shame and fear. Moreover, we tend to suppress or numb our feelings (Brown, 2011). Also, Brown (2011) asserts that vulnerability is also the birthplace of joy, belonging, and love. Wow, what a powerful statement!!! Brown's webcast made me think about my past experiences and fears. My aha moment was discovering that shame is not guilt. On many occasions, I had those feelings of "shame." However, the older I got I learned to "embrace" and "love" my flaws. I realized that I'm not going to please everyone, and that is ok! Brown (2011), suggests that we need to let ourselves to be vulnerable. I believe it is good for our soul!

My top characteristics of emotional competence are:

- I am curious about people

- I appreciate what I have

- I am a good judge of character

- I know my strengths and weaknesses

The characteristics that represent potential growth are:

- Ability to say NO to others

- Ability to let go of mistakes

- Avoid toxic people

I enjoyed Sinek's webcast on "Millennials in the workplace." In part because I am a mother of two Millennials!!! I just adore them!!! Sinek (2016) suggests that Millennials were treated as "special" by their parents. I agree! Yes, I did treat my kids as they are special because they are!!! Maybe is a culture thing, I am not sure!!! Moreover, I wanted my children to have all the things I did not have growing up.  As a parent, I believe is my duty to provide for them to best of my ability. I also believe they should not have struggles that I have had, and I should guide them and help them deal with those struggles! My children grew up to be educated, independent adults that have a close relationship with their parents and grandparents. I believe that social skills depend on upbringing, culture, and family structure. At my work, my department has more millennials than any other age group, and I have a great relationship with them. They are a great asset, and their technological skills are superb. We have to make sure we utilize those skills and show them how much they are appreciated. Millennials are very much technology addicts. However, being generation "X," I am techno addict myself. My I-phone is my lifeline, I'm always available, on social media, getting instant news from around the world. Furthermore, my mom who is a Baby-boomer is an I-phone and computer addict herself. So, labeling Millennials as "technology addicts" is a little extreme in my opinion. I believe that the world is very technologically advanced and all of us are "guilty" of technological addiction.

According to Goleman (2012), emotional intelligence consists of:

- self-awareness, ability to handle emotions

- self-regulation, ability to pursue goals, judgment

- motivation, passion

- empathy, ability to develop a rapport with another

  person

- ability to manage relationships, building networks

I think I need to work on my ability to handle emotions! At times, I get very emotional and passionate, about social issues and injustice.

"The ability to manage feelings is a skill no leader can be without" (Porter-O'Grady and Malloch, 2015, p. 423).

References

Brown, B. (2011, January 3).  Power of Vulnerability.  [TED Talk].  Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o

Goleman, D. (2012, April 23).  Emotional Intelligence.  [You Tube Video].  Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y7m9eNoB3NU  

Porter-O’Grady, T. & Malloch, K. (2015).  Quantum leadership: building better partnerships for sustainable health.  Burlington, MA:  Jones & Bartlett Learning

Sinek, S. (2016, December 28).  Millennials in the workplace.  [You Tube Video].  Retrieved from  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hER0Qp6QJNU